existential minimalist

Schermafbeelding 2018-01-29 om 19.14.19

Somehow I’ve known from the beginning of my minimalist journey, that this path will lead me to new beginnings, new understandings, new skills that I needed in order to fulfill my soul’s desire and life’s purpose. It’s strange how even-though I haven’t totally gotten to the point of being a remarkable minimalist yet, I already unlocked new paths and understandings in life. I’ve come to a critical point now where I am fully aware of my time being, of my personal life-span. The meaning of my existence in this world and what on earth I will do with this life I was given: what do I have to accomplish, what is the purpose I have in the place and time that I am at here and now. Fining that balance of being in harmony with your surroundings and with yourself is a real challenge. But it will definitely work by the practice of elimination of your negative attitude, downsizing the negativity in your life, embracing your lessons and forgiving your short-comings and finding gratitude in your path and world.

I believe the first real change I wanted to practice this year was this: get rid of the hate, start loving. Hate is truly a poison eating you alive. It even got me to a point of self-pity and solitude: I couldn’t find a way of living in this strange world that wasn’t operating the way I needed, I loathed my awareness, I wanted to be a sheep like anyone else. It took me some time to see that my life is just wonderful: I am wonderful. And nature, art and love are divine: it can be touching and overwhelmingly beautiful if you allow it to be. There isn’t a day where I ask myself what have I done to deserve my beautiful mind, my loving partner in life by my side, my blessings and even if I dare: a beautiful naked body (yes it isn’t the most beautiful one out there, but I must love how this piece of art works magically -especially the way it heals itself is just miraculously stunning-).

Somewhere by the end of last year I totally lost my self-respect, I did what others expected me to do and I didn’t listen to my personal well-being: I was overly stressed and I got very ill. No doctor could really help me or understand the illness I was going through, and I was so desperate to get out of that unpleasant state that it really took me a good couple of days of pondering and meditation to regain my strength and knowledge: only I could help myself and understand myself. And I needed to be listened to, firstly by me and secondly by those who affect me. But to truly listen to yourself, you need to calm your ego, calm your fears, make room for listening. Through the inexplicable tears I found the answer to my pain. Since then I started to grasp to meaning of actual health. I am nowhere near as healthy as I would like to be or as I ought to be: I need to start exercising daily, I want to eat better for my health (whole foods, just plant-based isn’t healthy enough*) and treat my life and body with the respect that I deserve towards myself from myself.

* Must-read literature: HOW NOT TO DIE by Michael Greger
photograph in this article is by verdenius on instagram